rachel has a blog

welcome to my blog.

sometimes I feel like I have too much going on in my head so I made this place to get it out. maybe all my meandering thoughts might help people. enjoy.

get to know me!

plus a bonus : spacehey!

ENTRY 1:

HELLO. 01/14/2025

this is my first blog entry. I won't bother introducing myself because I already did. i'll just start. do you find yourself feeling like anything good that comes to you always fades away? not in a nihilistic way or anything. it just feels like...a fact. the sky is blue, the earth is round, and good things never last. what do you do about this? do you find a way to make the good things last? do you ignore it when they go away? is ignorance really bliss? I don't really know the answer unfortunately. I wish I did. us humans, we crave permanence. immortality has been a concept progressively worshipped with the passage of time, but really, we never achieve it. we attempt to cope with a lack of permanence in immortal deities and theories of neverending afterlife. we always, and will always, attempt to falsely recreate a sense of permanence in the deluded and complex concept of 'time.' time is linear, yet everywhere, and we are always victim to it. it is out of our control. which is why I suppose good things don't last. time always gets you. but i suppose the inevitability of 'endings' can be good. sometimes I feel like everyone doesn't like me or that I am doomed to a shitty life. but if it all ends, does it even matter? again, I promise I'm not nihilistic...

ENTRY 2:

CHILDHOOD. 01/16/2025

today, I thought a lot about my childhood.
have you ever felt like you could miss something and be glad it's gone, too? it's a weird feeling.
I miss it, yet it brings a churning feeling to my stomach.
it had wonder, but also a deep sense of dread and shame.
it's hard to feel like the things you experience in life conflict you so much.
it kind of makes you feel like you can't understand yourself.
I hope I will one day.

ENTRY 3:

THRIFT HAUL. 01/17/2025

here are the things I found at the thrift store. I found 4 things.

- a cool 2000's velour tracksuit zip-up! it matches a pair of pants I already own.
- men's track pants that look baggy on me, which I like.
- baggy-ish low-rise 2000's jeans.
- low-rise 2000's brown cargo pants.

all super cute finds! till' next time.

ENTRY 4:

WHAT I GOT AT THE MALL. 01/21/2025

here are the things I found at the MALL! I got 6 things.

- snowpants
- a cool studded 2000s looking belt with a skull belt buckle!
- grey leggings. cute and comfy!
- a tank top with flowers on it
- a lip plumper gloss
- a glittery scented lotion

i also got taco bell. yum!

ENTRY 5:

PUPPY 01/27/2025

puppy

ENTRY 6:

I DON'T KNOW 01/14/2025

I am always digging for something that isn't there. I think it's because I always feel like if I try hard enough I will finally find it. But I think I have to accept that I won't.

ENTRY 7:

MY MUSIC 03/13/2025

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